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Considering divorce / living abroad w 2 children

GuestPoster1601

Hello, I have been married to an Indonesian woman for 10 years, and we have two small children, aged below 5.

We live in German, but not permanently. I am considering divorcing her for irreconcilable differences, but I feel our situation is too complicated. I am afraid she will want to take the children back to ID with her, where they might be subjected to stricter religious customs. We married in a Moslem court in Indonesia.

I would like to know:

  • Do I need to file the divorce in Indonesia? Can I file from abroad?
  • Which law is applicable for children, the law of the place we live or the Indonesian law?

Thanksss!

See also

Getting married in IndonesiaTraveling to IndonesiaDivorce through Kantor Agama or Civil courtsAustralian Aged Pension and the 2 year portability rule .Going for a 2nd marriage
shariffsadiq212

@Timelessness if you married her with legal documents you can contact your embassy and they always have preferred lawyers and then you can file complaint in police station and fill the legal divorce documents and if you she were cheating on you and if you have any proff of her cheating then it will easy for you to get the custody of your kids.

Fred

The civil side of the marriage is all that matters legally. You'll have to check if German law allows for a divorce from a marriage conducted overseas.

Then you need to know if that legal divorce is accepted in Indonesia, but only if you ever intend to return to the archipelago. She will have to consider that issue, but it will be really easy for her.


If she does get a divorce in Indonesia, you may have a settlement to pay. That would only be enforceable in Indonesia, so you might have to avoid the place. Under Indonesian law, an ex-wife with children should be supported. That, if she takes the kids, could leave you in a very dodgy position in Indonesia if you return. 


The Islamic side, unless you remarry with a Muslim, is of no importance for you.


Young kids are, in general, better with their mother. As for worrying about them learning about any religion,  you have a serious bigotry issue to address. I generally prescribe education to cure that one.

I'm unfamiliar with German law, but the mother takes priority here unless you can prove she's a bad mother, or you pay her off.

Your worries about her being religious is not much of a legal argument, especially when you accepted Islam (in civil and religious law in Indonesia) when you got married.

I strongly advise you to ignore that reasoning if you have to get a divorce here. Religious discrimination is illegal so you could end up in prison.

jimmyindo

@Fred yeah, he went to Indonesia, married under muslim law, and now he is worried his children might be influenced by the muslim religion.

dakotahotham

*** Norman is a Lawyer in Indonesia. I highly recommend him for this kind of advice.  He's very reliable and always offers great advice..

Moderated by Bhavna last year
Reason : Please recommend in private or in the business directory
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GuestPoster1601

Hello, thank you for your advice.

I don't have any problem with my children following their mother's religion, and in fact I give her support for her traditions, and hers to mine, which are different. We don't have problems in this sense. My fear is, once and if they go to Indonesia, our arrangement will end and there will be pressure from family to ignore my part in the deal.

Fred


    Hello, thank you for your advice.
I don't have any problem with my children following their mother's religion, and in fact I give her support for her traditions, and hers to mine, which are different. We don't have problems in this sense. My fear is, once and if they go to Indonesia, our arrangement will end and there will be pressure from family to ignore my part in the deal.
   

    -@Timelessness


You appear to have an issue with religion, then decide there's no issue.

Perhaps you would like to clarify your objection in order to clear up any confusion.

Rifani

@GuestPoster1601


Hi @GuestPoster1601


Divorce of Spouses Living Abroad

In relation to the husband or wife's domicile abroad, you need to know that Article 73 paragraph (3) of the Religious Courts Law regulates that:


"In the event that the plaintiff and defendant reside abroad, the lawsuit is submitted to the court whose jurisdiction includes the place where their marriage took place or to the Central Jakarta Religious Court."


  • Do I need to file the divorce in Indonesia? Can I file from abroad?


If you are abroad, one way to process a divorce in Indonesia is to use the services of a lawyer/advocate.

A lawyer/advocate is the party who will represent you as a plaintiff in court without having to go to court at all.

Lawyers / Advocates will take care of the divorce process from making the lawsuit letter, registering the divorce lawsuit to making the decision and divorce certificate.


  • Which law is applicable for children, the law of the place we live or the Indonesian law?

Children born from marriages registered in Indonesia will follow Indonesian law.


***


Have good day

Moderated by Cheryl last year
Reason : Advertising
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