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I'm sure some men in Belgium see you as "easy" because you are Asian, but please put the attitudes you find in perspective. Do a little research into life for women in Egypt, seen as the no1 sexual harrassment country in the world, where public rape of women is acceptable, where rape is so often seen as the woman's fault, where so often men openly say it's a woman's fault if they cannot keep their hands off the opposite sex. Thank god I do not live in Egypt I say, may one day attitudes change there.

schoolmum wrote:

I'm sure some men in Belgium see you as "easy" because you are Asian, but please put the attitudes you find in perspective. Do a little research into life for women in Egypt, seen as the no1 sexual harrassment country in the world, where public rape of women is acceptable, where rape is so often seen as the woman's fault, where so often men openly say it's a woman's fault if they cannot keep their hands off the opposite sex. Thank god I do not live in Egypt I say, may one day attitudes change there.

What I heard is, many women from Asia came for better lives, get their Belgian Nationalities and F off. Well, you can't go around classifying everyone in 1 category just because there are plenty.

And in actual fact, this is Belgium, not Egypt. Aren't people supposed to be educated and understanding like they so believe they are? Why do Belgian women get all the respects and Asians living in Belgium treated differently?! We deserve equal respect, nothing more nor less.

Perspective, that's my 2 cents.

I've got to agree with the OP here,
When I was in the Horeca trade I had to deal customers who would go to Asia ( Thailand/ Philippines mainly) and come back with a 'wife'
One in particular stuck out, he wasn't that old, maybe mid 40's or thereabouts and his 'wife' was a very nice thai lady.. He treated the poor woman worse than you would a dog on the street,always referring to her in the 3rd person while she was there, trying to discuss his sex life in front of her with strangers and generally being a total pig.... the list goes on.. I banned him from the bar because of his attitude to foreign women and how he spoke about his wife ( and remember, I am a guest in this country too)
Granted he was the worst of them but I've seen this attitude over and over again amongst well off middle aged Belgian males. It seems to be accepted as the norm in certain groups.

Sexual harassment exists throughout the world, I'm not justifying it at all, I've been subjected to it from time to time. Some people are unable to respect others. Yes you'll find the attitude towards Asian women in a minority of Belgian resident males, you'll also find harassment of veiled Muslim women (who are Belgian), overt racism against women Congolese origin (who are Belgian). Life can stink. Yes people should be more respectful. But at least you could complain to the Police here, in other countries if you did that, you would be incarcerated.

Well to be honest I get stared at like that by older men in Belgium so I dont think its just because you Asian

Jemmy12 wrote:

I've got to agree with the OP here,
When I was in the Horeca trade I had to deal customers who would go to Asia ( Thailand/ Philippines mainly) and come back with a 'wife'
One in particular stuck out, he wasn't that old, maybe mid 40's or thereabouts and his 'wife' was a very nice thai lady.. He treated the poor woman worse than you would a dog on the street,always referring to her in the 3rd person while she was there, trying to discuss his sex life in front of her with strangers and generally being a total pig.... the list goes on.. I banned him from the bar because of his attitude to foreign women and how he spoke about his wife ( and remember, I am a guest in this country too)
Granted he was the worst of them but I've seen this attitude over and over again amongst well off middle aged Belgian males. It seems to be accepted as the norm in certain groups.

Exactly Jemmy12, you just gave a better example of how disgusting it is.

The sad part is, these women cannot retaliate because they are afraid of getting a divorce or having to return to their country of origin.

I can understand why they put up with it. Many Thai's and Indonesian live better here, instead of having to squeeze in a small place with 20 others back home. They eat better too and need not work as their husbands provide for them and probably some even managed to send money home to their poor family.

All these husbands should really be ashamed of themselves. Just because they think they are superior and they are the saviors to their wives, they give no respect to their poor wives. That's why once they get their Belgian Nationalities, they will leave. Leave for the better than to be suffering here always!

hannahhadman wrote:

Well to be honest I get stared at like that by older men in Belgium so I dont think its just because you Asian

Erm, you are getting stared at because you are awesomely pretty and honestly, Hannah, you don't understand this Asian thingy. Maybe you should talk to your Asian friends more in regards to my topic.

I am sure they will tell you exactly what I've said.

Yassica wrote:

Jemmy12 wrote:

I've got to agree with the OP here,
When I was in the Horeca trade I had to deal customers who would go to Asia ( Thailand/ Philippines mainly) and come back with a 'wife'
One in particular stuck out, he wasn't that old, maybe mid 40's or thereabouts and his 'wife' was a very nice thai lady.. He treated the poor woman worse than you would a dog on the street,always referring to her in the 3rd person while she was there, trying to discuss his sex life in front of her with strangers and generally being a total pig.... the list goes on.. I banned him from the bar because of his attitude to foreign women and how he spoke about his wife ( and remember, I am a guest in this country too)
Granted he was the worst of them but I've seen this attitude over and over again amongst well off middle aged Belgian males. It seems to be accepted as the norm in certain groups.

Exactly Jemmy12, you just gave a better example of how disgusting it is.

The sad part is, these women cannot retaliate because they are afraid of getting a divorce or having to return to their country of origin.

I can understand why they put up with it. Many Thai's and Indonesian live better here, instead of having to squeeze in a small place with 20 others back home. They eat better too and need not work as their husbands provide for them and probably some even managed to send money home to their poor family.

All these husbands should really be ashamed of themselves. Just because they think they are superior and they are the saviors to their wives, they give no respect to their poor wives. That's why once they get their Belgian Nationalities, they will leave. Leave for the better than to be suffering here always!

As Schoolmum rightly said though, this is not just happening in Belgium, it's all too commonplace in many countries.
The type of people doing this see it as 'rescuing' the woman from a bad life but while there are some genuine people the majority I have encountered almost view their wives as possessions..

Jemmy12 wrote:

Yassica wrote:

Jemmy12 wrote:

I've got to agree with the OP here,
When I was in the Horeca trade I had to deal customers who would go to Asia ( Thailand/ Philippines mainly) and come back with a 'wife'
One in particular stuck out, he wasn't that old, maybe mid 40's or thereabouts and his 'wife' was a very nice thai lady.. He treated the poor woman worse than you would a dog on the street,always referring to her in the 3rd person while she was there, trying to discuss his sex life in front of her with strangers and generally being a total pig.... the list goes on.. I banned him from the bar because of his attitude to foreign women and how he spoke about his wife ( and remember, I am a guest in this country too)
Granted he was the worst of them but I've seen this attitude over and over again amongst well off middle aged Belgian males. It seems to be accepted as the norm in certain groups.

Exactly Jemmy12, you just gave a better example of how disgusting it is.

The sad part is, these women cannot retaliate because they are afraid of getting a divorce or having to return to their country of origin.

I can understand why they put up with it. Many Thai's and Indonesian live better here, instead of having to squeeze in a small place with 20 others back home. They eat better too and need not work as their husbands provide for them and probably some even managed to send money home to their poor family.

All these husbands should really be ashamed of themselves. Just because they think they are superior and they are the saviors to their wives, they give no respect to their poor wives. That's why once they get their Belgian Nationalities, they will leave. Leave for the better than to be suffering here always!

As Schoolmum rightly said though, this is not just happening in Belgium, it's all too commonplace in many countries.
The type of people doing this see it as 'rescuing' the woman from a bad life but while there are some genuine people the majority I have encountered almost view their wives as possessions..

Yes it is happening quite commonly in many countries but none of those I lived in. Well, don't worry I'm just ranting because I know very well nothing can change the fact.

In actual fact, some of the Belgian women also have that "I am far better than you" attitude towards Asian. I had encounter many. Once this lady whom is a friend of my mother in law spoke to me in a condescending manner. I was like..

I don't blame them, I forgive them for their ignorance. Because the more they behave like this, the more I laugh at how stupid some can be.

Give it another ten years and I'll probably end up a dirty old letch perving on pretty Asians!

balesy1974 wrote:

Give it another ten years and I'll probably end up a dirty old letch perving on pretty Asians!

The thing there is you'll have a sly look if nothing else..
I wouldn't consider myself a gentleman by any means, I was raised as a poor kid without a pot to p*ss in, but I do have a basic understanding of respect for women.

I think the OP viewed her experience as race related specifically against Asian people,while there is somewhat of a subculture in many European countries that promote the exploitation of Asian women in search of a better life the fact remains that this behaviour is not limited to any single race/ethnic group.
For instance, I have a Belgian girlfriend of 3 years, she is in her early 20's and if I do say so she is what the general public perceive as 'hot'. Guys, both young and old will look at her, as you or I would if we see a stranger on the street.
The difference is that you or I would not in effect purchase the sole rights to any girl. We would try to build a stable relationship built upon trust and mutual respect.
EDIT/ I should note that I totally understand your post was taking the piss, I'm not arguing any points here with you at all :-), I just hate seeing this sort of stuff going on in a supposedly civilized 1st world country. ( The same goes for Ireland,they are f**kin' years behind in  tolerance and integration)

Jemmy12 wrote:

I totally understand your post was taking the piss

Totally, although this topic is still a very serious subject!

Nobody should ever be judged or presumptions made about them in relation to their sex, race and appearance but unfortunately it goes on around the world in every country, every single day.

Well I guess its just one of those things. Not a very nice thing for anyone but still. However not nice and really I don't see it to often up here. Even when my friend from Singapore was here she didn't have much of a issue and never said she was uncomfortable. (However we never went into a Brussels) So I guess in that way im lucky that I live more into north west.

Well... I think staring is something prevails everywhere and I guess that's not always about being sexual or something. We stare at many things like beautiful, weird, funny and different.

I guess its more about psychology, when you feel nervous or vulnerable you make yourself victimized by each and every action of others. A very good example is when I wear a very nice pair of jeans and shirt I feel every girl around me is staring at me and want me out on a date... So may be the old man was just not able to cope up with jerks of busses (even I can't keep myself straight with those jerks)  and touched you somehow.....    I do respect your opinion and what you feel, but may be you can give it another thought!!!

btw I am an Asian boy, and some old ladies do stare at me... :-) you know the reason is they are jealous of my tanned skin, I actually asked one of those ladies

Hope you have a great life,
Prateek

Well men are always disturbingly after me too so it is not because  You are from Asia.

So all I am sayin'You are not alone.I am a different race but  I am struggling with the same problem as You are.
I am disturbed by m. men all the time,yes they even touch me too on public transport and things like that. I can not do anything against it. And Do You know why? Because they see my eastern european face what I can not hide obviously and they immediately posing questions like this:" Do You work at the Gare du Nord? " (as unfortunately many berautiful and very young eastern europeans do)Do You want to drink a little alcohol with me? things like that.And if You think I can rely on other people's help or protection. Think again!

Well I get the problem with being looked at and ramdomly old guys waving all me all the time which seems to be the new ones and this is from a relatively nice area i get it much much worse near Brussels. Also I agree like said it is a not nice thing but its not race bound. Sorry to hear your being touched it must be horrid

Nobody has the right to touch you..
While I wouldn't recommend carrying something like pepper spray or mace I could definitely understand why some women feel the need to do so.
(My own Girlfriend is Belgian and she regularly takes pepper spray if she is out alone )

I didnt know you could get away with useing it here lol. I guess im just used to living in a rough aera

hannahhadman wrote:

I didnt know you could get away with useing it here lol. I guess im just used to living in a rough aera

That's why I wouldn't recommend using it..
I am far from convinced of it's legality
When I worked back in Ireland we always had some under the counter of the bar 'just in case' but thankfully never saw the need to use it

Yeah your luckly lol bars I worked in didnt even have that lol

I wouldn't think they are concerned with rights.They just touch, even if i say still politely: please do not touch me. Once a man even followed me home.I did not realized that i have not managed to loose him (i did not even talked to him),so i literaly run home and by the time I have called the elevator suddenly driven by an instinct just turned my head, and i could see him in front of the big glass entrance door!I panicked. After this I could randomly bump into him in the area where i live.

Some random woman approached me yesterday on Rue de la Fourche and started touching my hair in the street, it was a bit freaky!

I can totally sympathise with anyone getting pawed at by strangers, even as big and as ugly as I am, I found it a very uncomfortable scenerio.

lol as if that is a big creepy lol