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Homophobia In Ecuador

Coxhere

How homophobic, generally speaking, is Ecuador? What about homophobia in urban areas vs. rural areas of the country? I ask because I'm wondering how "open" one can be in Ecuadorian society without fearing for one's life.

Thanks for your response.

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WesleyThompson

We are looking to retire there as well. I am interested to read your responses.

Wesley

j600rr

I am sure others that live in Ecuador who have much more knowledge will chime in.

My Ecuadorian brother-in-law's brother is homosexual, and he never seems to have many problems. He lives in Quito which is a big city. Big of course depending on your view of big. Most cities the world over tend to be more liberal, and more counties, or rural areas tend to be more conservative.

Will say that at my sisters wedding he had a female date. He said it was best to keep the illusion for some of the family. Think he was probably refering to the older generations in his family. To my knowledge there is no homophobia on a large scale. Am sure you'll have some who aren't happy, but that's the world over again.

Like I said. Someone with some more knowledge will probably chime in on the subject

vsimple

My neighbor is gay and similar to j600rr brother-in-law's brother, his family doesn't know. I see gay/lesbian couples walking hand in hand sometimes in my area and once seen a lesbian couple making out in the park, but no where near the PDA that heterosexual couples often display. The mentality is quite machista, at least in the highlands, so maybe that's why some gay people conceal their orientation from family.

norviato1

Most young people in Ecuador are quite accepting of homosexuals. Having said that, the older generation hasnt caught up yet. This would include some 做厙輦⑹s that grew up thinking that was a big no no. Older Ecuadoreans are conservative by nature and avoid the subject. The larger cities like Quito, Guayaquil and Cuenca to a certain extent have lots of venues for gays. Remember in spite of attitudes, Ecuador has a very inclusive constitution that doesnt allow discrimination based on sexual orientation. We dont have gay marriage yet but I suspect its coming down the pike. Right now you can have civil unions which is known as union de hecho It provides you with the same rights as any heterosexual couple. Hope this helps.

norviato1

We had an evangelical pastor with the last name of Zabala who was also involved in politics. This man was extremely homophobic and kept spewing hate against the community. The Ecuadorean government fined and suspended him from participating in politics for two years. Therere quite a few U-Tube videos about this, if you understand Spanish. I dont think even the U.S. has graduated to that level.
Were stuck in Trumpland ignorance trying to deal with it LOL

Coxhere

G'Evening, Norviato1 (as well as those others who have replied to my question so far).

Thanks for your message. It's helpful.

If I'm not mistaken, I thought that my husband said marriage equality (same-sex marriage) exists in Ecuador. But I may be wrong about what he told me. For sure, he said that Ecuador is light-years ahead of the U. S. in terms of other Gay rights.

Does the Ecuadorian government recognize legitimate, marriage equality (same-sex marriages) from the United States? Or would we (still) be required to get a civil union license in order for the Ecuadorian government to recognize ours as a legitimate, legally-binding relationship?

My husband was born and raised in Quito but now lives with me in the States (The Commonwealth of Kentucky). We are working towards his becoming a naturalized U. S. citizen, at which time he can have dual citizenship and also dual passports.

We've discussed us moving (back) to Quito once he is a United States citizen so that I would be able to become a naturalized, Ecuadorian citizen also, with dual citizenship and passports.

Moving to Quito is why I've written to ask regarding Gays living in Ecuador. Antonio and I have absolutely NO intention of living in a gringo ghetto. . . . (smile)

Lurch

My wife and I live in Cuena for the last three years. We had an open attitude previously because of the industry my wife was in
The 做厙輦⑹s we know in Cuenca are very relaxed about it . We mainly don't think about it. And most of the people we mix with don't. Yes there is an element of Trumpistas and Religious in the 做厙輦⑹s but you soon get away from them.
For the Ecuadorians it's different. They live in a family fishbowl. That means the family gets together every Sunday and live within a few houses. Being nominal Catholics it would be difficult to be accepting. As an example guys get drunk on Saturday afternoon and sleep it off in the streets , they can't go home being drunk. The younger people don't seem to care because of the heavy emphasis on Anti discrimination laws. There are night clubs for friendly exchanges . So overall don't worry about it you'll be welcome

Lurch

Depending on the age of your EC husband you may run into a largely unspoken prejudice. The lady who helps with our medical translations etc is 30 years my junior. When we go to the hospital we get a few scowls. They think she is my wife and has married me for my money. Little do they know how incorrect all of that is, but it's just a funny feeling.

Coxhere

Antonio is 30 years my junior as well. . . . (smile)

norviato1

Good evening Coxhere
Im sure that Ecuador doesnt have gay marriage yet. Civil unions or union de hecho is something that was passed when Rafael Correa was president. Now we have Lenin Moreno and far as I know hes pretty liberal so gay marriage might not be far away in the horizon. Many people in the gay community voted for him. If it wasnt for the Catholic church gay marriage would already be a reality today.
Im not certain about Americans having dual citizenship or not. But I do know that Ecuador allows that so your partner can have both after he obtains his U.S. citizenship. I was born in Quito myself but have lived most of my life in the U.S. I could carry two passports if I wished.

norviato1

I doubt that your same sex marriage from the states would be recognized in Ecuador.
Youll probably have to wait on that one.
In the mean time do a civil union union de hecho and have the same rights.
Whats the difference?

norviato1

Theyll just think youre his grandfather with money haha!

norviato1

I have to differ on some of your comments. My family is scattered in different places and we dont live in a fish bowl. And no, I dont get drunk over the weekend and pass out somewhere and ashamed to go home. That sounds like rednecks in the U.S. and some low class Ecuadoreans. The comment is hilarious!

norviato1

Lurch,
Why would anyone suspect the other woman is your wife? Do you sport a butch boy haircut? Just kidding! Ecuadorean humor! LOL

norviato1

Coxhere,
Nothing wrong with living in a gringo ghetto. Theyre usually the safest and not too poor LOL

Coxhere

Buenas Tardes, Norviato.

If living in a gringo ghetto has "nothing wrong with" it, then I will have to figure out other ways of interacting and improving my Spanish with those who speak Spanish as a primary language. I'm aware that, because of Northern European heritage (pale skin----typing these two words makes me think of the term that Native Americans supposedly said [in old, inaccurate movies that depicted Indios!]----"pale faces"). I know that I will always standout as a "pale face" gringo. However, I'm hoping that I acquire skills to understand rapidly spoken Spanish and the ability to respond just as rapidly, fluent Spanish in return. Then I'll be a gringo who knows the language. And, if nowhere else and also speaking incluyendo idiomas espa簽oles, la gente en los campos will be surprised. Espero que s穩.

Oh, also my husband, Antonio (a簽ito m穩o) me dijo que me va a quedar en todas las circunstancias que nos encuentremos.

癒A pr籀posito, me encanta tus y mis discusiones escritas!

norviato1

Surprise, surprise. Youll never be the only pale face in Ecuador. About 10% of the population is of european heritage, mostly from Spain. Im one of them and they also call me gringo even though Im not. On my fathers side theyre of Basque origin and Andalucian from my moms. That one to me is the most interesting as it goes back to the 16 hundreds. Anyway, Ecuador is multiethnic and racial, so you wont be the king of anything there. LOL I see that your Spanish isnt stellar cause Im not sure what youre trying to say. Thats where your marido comes in. LOL By the way, 簽a簽o means brother more than anything. I get a kick every time you call your partner husband thats so funny! I also lived for a year with my partner in Mt. Sterling Kentucky, thats close to Lexington. He was originally from West Virginia, hillbilly country. LOL

Coxhere

I checked EVERY word of EVERY sentence with my husband, Antonio. According to Tony, a Ecuadorian native who was born and raised in Quito, Ecuador, whose primary language is Western Hemisphere Spanish (he also lived in Madrid, Spain for five years) every sentence is appropriate and completely understandable. He's told me that "nanito" is a term of endearment and he loves when I call him by this intimate, loving word. (By the way, "husband" is not funny to us. It's taken thousands of years to finally, legally, for Gays to have obtained marriage equality. Why is "husbands" funny to you? "Partner" is funny to us. Are the two of you legally married?) I love West Virginia. It reminds me of the state of my birth, Oklahoma. It's a state that's also made fun because of the affects of the "Dust Bowl." Oklahomans left the state because they had no jobs and because they were starving. My hometown is located on the western slopes of the Ozark Mountains. Okmulgee, which means "boiling water" in the Muscogee (Creek) Indians' language, is the capital of The Creek Indian Nation.

norviato1

Youre way too technical and get hang up on little things, just because I didnt understand your Spanish. Maybe its my fault and you dont need to consult your marido or 簽a簽ito. LOL The important thing is that you try and thats all that matters. My moms only brother lived in Spain since 1953 and was a career diplomat. Hes buried in Madrid but my cousins are still alive. For me the triangle was always Ecuador, Spain and the U.S. Now Im a bit tired of Trumpland and contemplating a move to where I was born. No panacea there as I would be exchanging a set of problems with some others.
No we werent married and the key word is was my partner because he died in January of this year. He was in the military for 22 years and made a career out of it. He came from the coal camps in West Virginia but pulled himself out of that situation. He became a stable well traveled and educated individual. He was 5 years younger than me even though he looked like my father. LOL I never used the word husband because I feel like Id be trying to imitate a heterosexual relationship. The forms here in the U.S. and certainly in Ecuador have been changed to reflect those current differences for the most part. If they keep it somewhat ambiguous it doesnt leave anyone out. What you said about thousands of years. Im not sure, I would have to look it up. Im not quite comfortable writing personal things on this forum because its usually read and answered by the know it all gringos that have a lot of time on their hands. This is a topic that many of them avoid and dont know much about. Notwithstanding, they rule the roost on all subjects. Si quieres hablar en privado te puedo dar mi email.
Saludos

Coxhere

Me gustaria tu correro eletronico. Muchas gracias en ofrecermelo.

norviato1

***

Ah穩 lo tienes.

Moderated by Christine 6 years ago
Reason : please share your contact via your private message system. Thank you.
norviato1

Vamos a tratar de esta forma para ver si resulta.
***

Moderated by Priscilla 6 years ago
Reason : do not post your personal contact details for your own security
Lurch

Why do you need to pick apart other people's comments?
We live in Cuenca which is a very insular society. You are born , go to school here , get a job and live here. It's family and who you know not what you know. Yes young men get drunk in El Centro and can't go home , so they sleep it off
A lot no I'll see maybe three a week.its not redneck behaviour .
There is an open adherence to Catholicism here that is not really reflected in private. There has been a seismic change in morality here with a lot of men going to the States in the 90's following the collapse of the sucre. Their horizons opened up and there has been a lot of girlfriends stateside, new wife's , babies popping up etc etc. Then they return home with all these changes. With that has come more tolerance of other lifestyles.
We did live in El Centro and more mixed and were forced to do better at Cuenca Spanish. It's different in word useage and of course non Castilian. Living there is much better for that but apts are older and a lot of stairs . We had to move with my bum knee.
Anyway there is a lot of love here which will conquer all

norviato1

Lurch,
Let me tell you something. Picking apart comments is part of me and my sense of humor. Just like you making erroneous statements based on your perception of things there are part of you. I would call that hit and miss and the latter seems to be your expertise. Thats why I made the comment in one of my postings about the know it all gringos. Does that ring a bell? Im an Ecuadorean typical in ways that understands the mentality and you claim to be the expert? Most of you dont master the language and never become fully integrated. You have no clue on the class system that prevails in Ecuadorean society. If you did you wouldnt make those simplistic statements. Thats the reason why I think youre hilarious. And now youre given us lessons on whats Castilian and what isnt. You could really make some bucks as a comedian. Americans have a tremendous need to feel superior and often belittle others in their quest for it. If you were rubbing elbows with the elites you wouldnt feel that way. lol So next time you put everyone in the fish bowl and display your PhD on things you dont really understand completely. Just give yourself and us a break! Whats really changing society worldwide is the internet. Not the returning Ecuadoreans with gringo habits. Thats so funny! Remember youre a guest there and not judge and jury!

Lurch

Moderated by Bhavna 6 years ago
Reason : Personal attack
We invite you to read the forum code of conduct
stumpy

I suggest that everyone take a deep breath and get back on topic please.

The posts now are getting to be of a personal nature and will get permanent bans if it continues.

I also suggest that people read the terms and conditions located at the bottom of this page.

norviato1

Stumpy, If you go back and read some of the posts from Lurch. Youll see that shes the one that started the negative comments about Ecuadoreans getting drunk and living in a fish bowl etc. As an Ecuadorean I have to clarify her ignorant statements. If she spoke about the colonial art and architecture, as well as culture that exists there I would have to problem with of that. Instead she focuses on the negative and that doesnt sit right with me. Since when does the word gringo pertain to race? This woman is so far off of the mark its not even funny. Even gringos refer themselves by the name without offense. Youre right the topic is homofobia in Ecuador and we should stick to the subject. I dont have a bruised ego and no reason to have one. From now on I wont answer any of Lurchs comments as Id be wasting my time.

Priscilla

Hi everyone,

Thread temporarily closed for review.

Thanks,

Priscilla

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